The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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