Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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